Sunday, May 06, 2012

Grades this semester have been a major disappointment - so far I see nothing higher than a B. Such a stark contrast from my first semester, and it baffles me because I put in so much more effort this sem but the results don't seem to reflect it. So does the problem lie with me? Sometimes I'm so tired of all these tricks fate plays on me, I just want to get a grade that is equivalent to the effort that I've put in.

Being constantly surrounded by people who say they are screwed simply because they got an A- doesn't make me feel any better either, when deep down I'm just praying to get a 3.0. Tbh I'm disliking SMU more and more by the second, and I would say I'm completely regretting my choice to study there, or rather, my choice to study business management over law in the first place. The teaching pedagogy is not one that allows me to study optimally. Times like this make me wish I had gone to Notts, a less cut-throat environment, a complete change away from Singapore's rigid education system. But then again if I had left, I would not have been able to do many things as well - dance, be close to loved ones, etc. Guess we can't have the best of both worlds.

Thoughts of quitting school crossed my mind several times, but I suppose I have to live with the decision, whether right or wrong, that I've made. At least I still have 6 more sems to work hard for. Oh well such is life.

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